It should be easy buying a gift for my husband, Randy. He has varied, fun, passionate interests – music, playing bass, wine collecting, and clothes, just to name a few. With a 65th birthday coming up, finding something should be a snap. Instead, it’s a Herculean task. Here are three reasons why…
Randy buys whatever he needs throughout the year – My husband loves to shop, especially online. Like Quick Draw McGraw, it’s impossible to outmaneuver him in the product-buying department. He has the steadiest mouse hand this side of the Mississippi and uses it liberally. Anytime I’ve thought of getting a clothing item for him, he’s already ordered it in several colors, and they’re being delivered at that moment.
I don’t “speak the language” of his hobbies – I hear Randy and my oldest son, Patrick, (who’s also a musician) talk “music gear.” They might as well speak Swahili with conversations about P.A. systems and wah-wah pedals. I wouldn’t know how to buy Randy a new amp or doohickey if I wanted to. And the few times I’ve tried, he ended up discreetly exchanging it for the amp or doohickey he wanted.
It’s hit or miss – Over the years, he’s received tons of wine, online courses, tickets to Broadway shows, concerts, and reservations at fun restaurants. Some were received with great enthusiasm, bulls-eyes. Still, others I could tell, were given polite applause (like when we saw “The Jersey Boys” which I loved, but he was meh about).
Turns out I’m not alone in this dilemma. My sons Patrick, Paul, and I recently confessed we were flummoxed for this big birthday. After conferring, we came up with a simple but brilliant plan.
We asked Randy what he wanted.
“I’d love a lifetime membership in this great Bass Instruction Video Club,” he said.
Excellent! It was a little out of our budget, but Randy deserves it. Not only is he a great husband and father but was all set to have a big birthday bash. We had invited old and new friends and were having it catered with live music and the whole shebang.
And then Covid reared its head…again.
We were told by experts, we can either have the party outside (and be scarily dependent on weather) or have it inside where everyone wears masks. Considering the eating and drinking involved, those masks wouldn’t be on long. If anyone got sick, we would never forgive ourselves.
To our sadness, the party was cancelled.
So now Randy’s having a small family gathering for his big day. Still enjoyable, and sometime in the future, he’ll have his big, splashy gala.
And yet, despite this Covid set-back, I see how my husband is lucky.
At 65, he has family and friends who love him. We’re all (knock on wood) healthy even though a pandemic rages around us. Randy’s retired and lives the life he wants and deserves, after decades of providing for his family, sometimes with serious medical issues.
Yes, it’s nice to come up with the perfect token of our affection, and some years, we’ve come close.
But maybe the best gift of all is a life well-lived. And in that way Randy is, indeed, the man who has everything.
Do you have a man/woman in your life impossible to buy gifts for? Comments are always welcome and if you like, please share.
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