5 Big Myths About Women

Lots of debate can be heard these days over what females should do with their lives. Are we to have more traditional roles? Or can we do whatever the heck we want? Whatever you believe a woman’s place to be, I think we can safely set aside these 5 worn gender tropes…

Women aren’t competitive – I knew an older lady who always let her husband “win” in card games. She grew up in Texas and thought it was unladylike for a woman to come out ahead, even emasculating. She hid her talent and smarts to make him feel better. That’s how she was raised.

How times have changed. One only has to watch the game show, Jeopardy to see women’s competitive streaks on full display. Years ago, you rarely saw a female win, but along came Mattea Roach, Victoria Groce, and Adriana Harmeyer, to name a few. They bet big, were quick on the buzzer, and seemed to know everything. They won—a lot. They finally broke (I think) that psychological barrier. Women like to compete and damn, they’re good.

Women aren’t supportive of each other –If you base your views of females on the “Real Housewives” franchise you’d be forgiven for thinking we’re all at each other’s throats. I came across one the other day and my blood pressure rose just watching them lean toward each other angrily, eyes popping, neck veins bulging. They called each other ugly, unrepeatable names.

Thankfully, most women are not like that. I go to a female dental practice. The entire team of twenty are mostly women. As I sit in that chair, I hear them consulting with each other in the hallway. Many times, there’s laughter and I’ve heard cheers when someone brings in a delicious treat to share. The vibe is light, but professional. Without cooperation, these women couldn’t keep this successful business running. I always walk away feeling proud of them.

Women aren’t good at “male” jobs – After graduating college in 1978, I snagged my first employment in the marketing department of a big beverage firm. Like many of my male friends, I expected to be put on the management track. Imagine my surprise when I was led to the IBM Selectric outside my boss’s office. In fact, all the hallways of this large company were lined with “girls” then known as secretaries, some women in their 60s. We were expected only to be in supporting roles.

How times have changed. A generation of women have grown up with amazing female role models—lawyers, doctors, senators, pilots, astronauts, and CEO’s. I just met a beautiful young girl, going to Georgia Tech, wanting to become a civil engineer. My cousin’s daughter graduated UCLA Law School with honors. Once that gate was open, women have proven themselves every bit as capable and confident as men. I love it.

Women will take any man to get married – Up till the past generation or two, women were considered “past their prime” if they weren’t off the single shelf by 25. Independence in young women was never encouraged, in fact, it was actively discouraged, even mocked at times. Females felt pressure to marry, even if deep down, they knew the guy wasn’t right.

Now a lot of young women are waiting to get hitched. “This generation is so different,” my friends and I have noted, over coffeehouse lattes. “They wait so long to do everything.” But maybe that’s good. Some women have opted to not get married at all. And although certain politicians call them “sad cat ladies,” they’re hardly that. They have agency and choice over their lives our grandmothers and great-grandmothers would have fainted over.

Women should all become mothers—I used to volunteer at a shelter for homeless teenage girls. I saw young women taken in by the state because of horrible abuse at home. Others were given over by their parents, no longer wanted. That’s when I realized not every female should become a mother.

I’m not judging these women. They have harder lives than I’ll ever know. Many had children too early or with the wrong man (or men). They grew up on the mean streets and that’s all they knew. But either delayed motherhood or abstaining would’ve helped them a lot. Thankfully, most women make wonderful, caring parents. But a few would’ve been better opting out.

Yes, we’ve come far in the past few decades. And maybe that scares or angers some people. I hear about the triumphs of my gender and couldn’t feel prouder.

Let’s keep going.

 

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