5 Awesome (And Yes, Shocking!) Holiday Hosting Tips

After over four decades of entertaining, I’ve learned a few things from the trenches. I used to have great energy as a hostess, but as the years have moved along, that stamina has waned. I still love seeing family and friends, but have learned interesting ways to make getting together easier…

Take-out for dinner – There, I said it. I used to feel I had to whip up a gourmet meal for sit-down suppers. But as the years went on, I realized one little problem: I don’t like to cook. Now I frequent this wonderful Spanish restaurant up the street, which makes a seafood or meat paella I could only whip up in my dreams. It’s perfect for guests. Since it’s nice having something homemade, I’ll put together a healthy, green salad. Unless you love to cook, make it easy on yourself. Take shortcuts.

Disposable plates for desserts and appetizers – Yes, after decades of drowning in small dinnerware needing to be washed after a party, I now go wild. I use disposable plates (okay, they’re pretty, disposable plates, mind you) for smaller courses. The world continues to spin on its axis. No guest has fainted and needed smelling salts from the experience. In fact, I doubt anyone has noticed. But I have—especially when I throw them into the garbage at the end of the evening. Voila. Work cut in half.

Have guests bring appetizers – I finally realized minutiae stresses me out most about entertaining. All those tiny details. And no part of the evening has more specifics than appetizers. Cheese (several kinds), crackers (several kinds), grapes, olives, pate, charcuterie, shrimp, sauce for the shrimp, lemons for the shrimp…the list goes on and on. So, I’ve learned to ask guests to bring an app. Not only do the great cooks in the group perk up at the challenge, but I end up with finger food to die for, way beyond my pay grade. Minutiae solved.

Accept help (and if it’s family, expect help) – I used to think I had to do everything myself. Then I wised up. When people offer to pitch in, I accept. It even occurred to me, when I’m over someone else’s house, I like helping pour the water or placing platters on the table. That little informal interaction is nice. Especially after sitting a lot, I’m ready to move around and do things. Even nicer, some of the best “sidebar” conversations take place in the kitchen with friends folding napkins, arranging the desserts, or taking out the coffee cups.

Accepting my social limitations – Alas, I’m an introvert. I have great fun with family and friends, but by the third hour, I’m winding down. I used to fight it. Now I understand. It doesn’t matter how wonderful the company; I start losing steam. That’s when I let my extroverted husband Randy take over. As I get quieter, he’s just revving his social engines. Family and good friends know me well and understand we won’t be going strong at 1:00 a.m. By then, their hostess will be snoozing in bed. The curtain always comes down well before midnight, and I appreciate that.

So, there they are. We can enjoy entertaining, but on our terms. Wait a minute. Taking care of both our guests and ourselves? Maybe that’s not so shocking after all.

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