What’s This Thing Growing in Our Yard!?

 

It started as a small white orb next to our pond. At first, I thought a neighborhood kid had left behind a somewhat deflated soccer ball. But as the days and weeks went by, this strange thing kept growing… and growing… and growing. Eventually it reached the size of a beach ball. What’s happening, I wondered? For answers, I turned to my go-to group, the Connecticut Audubon Society.

“It’s a puffball,” someone said, “a big, harmless mushroom. They just sprout up for no reason sometimes.”

“Kick it!” one person advised. “You’ll get this amazing “spore shower.” Although tempted (kidding), I passed. I don’t want to take a ‘spore shower’ and breathe in God-knows-what kind of mushroom fumes. Plus, it seems a little mean. Poor Mr. Puffball was just minding his own business. I had no desire to vaporize him.

“Eat it!” someone else suggested. They even sent a photo showing a puffball cut in half, looking like a dense, round white loaf of bread. I guess you take the innards and slather them on toast. Blech. Again, a hard pass.

So, what was I supposed to do with this ever-expanding mass of fungus? Apparently, nothing. I touched it one day and it felt like any mushroom, cold, smooth, and rubbery.

Since we’ve never had a puffball in twenty-two years, I couldn’t help wondering—is this a harbinger of some kind? According to Druid lore, puffballs are good signs, symbolizing growth, and human renewal. Okay…I’ll take that. But sometimes I see it like the monolith at the beginning of  “2001: a Space Odyssey,” this strange, indifferent apparition causing confusion and panic among the natives.

The other day I walked by the pond, expecting to measure the puffball’s latest growth spurt…but it was gone. On the ground, lay a few puffball-type pieces. Had it exploded from sheer girth? Or was it helped along by the guys who mow our lawn? I’ll never know. But I must admit, I felt a little sad looking at the crime scene, like being at the end of an intriguing science experiment.

Even crazier, a few yards away, another puffball is sprouting up, this one the size of a baseball. How big will this one grow? I’ll find out. And are the Druids trying to tell us something?

Older and wiser, I’ll know what to expect from son of Puffball. I’ll watch this round, white orb expanding until it either explodes, or our mowing crew takes it out.

Either way, I’ll be sure to avoid the spore shower.

 

Have you had a puffball or some strange growth on your property? Comments are always welcome and if you’d like to receive posts by email, just press here.