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Ever have something you take for granted, even though it makes your life better? You even mistreat it. Sometimes you forget it’s there. But there’s no mistaking you need this thing. The other day I couldn’t find mine and started panicking…

Yes, I’m using my eyeglasses more and more.

It’s hard getting older. For a long time, I wore my contact lenses with ease. When I started having eye trouble (corneal-related) I was in denial. I told myself, the eye doctor was mistaken. I could still wear my contacts from morning to night.

But I was wrong. My contacts no longer glide over my eyes like second skin. Instead, they feel gritty, like sandpaper.

These days I can only wear them for a few hours, maybe one or two days a week. It’s like having to visit an old friend in prison. And to my frustration, these reunions are becoming more and more short-lived. Sometimes I rush to take them back off.

Now, I’m wearing my glasses when I go out (something I never used to do) and removing them as soon as possible. I still don’t like this apparatus on my face. Trouble is, sometimes taking them off is a bad idea.

The other day my husband Randy and I were waiting for friends in a restaurant. I had placed my glasses on the table, as usual.  Our friends entered. I waved as they walked in and headed toward our table. As they came closer, I started to stand and give them each a hug.

But to my surprise, they walked right past us. That’s when I realized they weren’t our friends. They were another couple that probably wondered who that crazy woman was, smiling and waving.

I sat, embarrassed.

For such an important item, I treat my wire-rimmed lenses carelessly. I misplace them daily. I plunk them down on the nearest table if I don’t feel like wearing them, which is often.

Maybe, subconsciously, I’m not ready to acknowledge their importance in my life.

Before contacts, in high school, I’d only wear my round, tortoise-shell frames sparingly in the classroom. Looking back, people probably thought I was standoffish. But I wasn’t snobby walking those halls, oblivious to smiles or waves. I was blind.

Then came 1974 and I discovered the miracle of contacts. Back then they were hard little discs. In medieval times, they would’ve made excellent torture devices. But I loved them. For the first time, I saw myself without glasses. I could wear eye make-up! I didn’t have to choose between vanity and vision.

Over the next decades, contacts grew softer and more comfortable. I could keep them on all day. I felt sorry for those who couldn’t wear them, confined to glasses.

And now… I’m one of them.

And yes, in the world of losses, not being able to wear contacts is hardly earth shattering.

Still…

Recently Randy and I were at a local concert. As usual, I took my glasses off and kept them in my lap. Like so many times, I forgot about them.

At the end of the show, we stood to give a standing ovation (for, not so ironically, KT Tunstall, who sings “Suddenly I See”). We turned to leave, moving back up the aisle, when I realized I hadn’t put on my glasses. I felt my pockets and my purse, starting to panic. They weren’t there.

Everything was blurry. If I couldn’t find them, my world would look like this for weeks until they were replaced.

My heart beat fast as I went back to my seat,. What if someone had stepped on them? Finally, I found them, lying on the floor, under the chair. I put them on and everything came into sharp focus. I could see faces. Even the colors seemed brighter.

And that’s when I knew I’d been taking my glasses for granted. Without them, I can’t navigate life. I can’t drive. The world is a blur of people and things. My existence becomes smaller, more constricted.

And as much as I’m leaving this contact-wearing era kicking and screaming, I’m also learning to surrender and yes, even be grateful. I’m learning to live my life with glasses.

At the concert that night, I was so happy to have my vision back.  I breathed a sigh of relief and hurried back up the aisle.

 

Do you wear glasses or contacts? Comments are always welcome. And if you feel inclined, please share. Thank you!

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Comments(56)

  1. Hi Laurie, I wear glasses mostly to correct glare. I have transition lenses. I don’t think they look so good and I often feel hidden but I just can’t stand the glare. I can’t tolerate a lower rim either so I can’t wear the chunky cool ones. I have to just wear what is comfy and be happy with my sensitive self!

      • Laurie Stone

      • 7 years ago

      Jennie, Sounds like we have similar challenges. I also want to wear those cool chunky glasses (a la Tina Fey), but because my lenses are like coke bottles, I don’t think I can. Oh well, as you said, we must be happy with who we are.

  2. I’ve worn glasses forever and prefer them to contacts. But last year I was out walking with a friend when they fogged up. I took them off and stuck them over the collar of my shirt. After I got home (I see good enough without them that I didn’t miss them) I realized they were gone. Frantic, I rushed back to where we’d walked and we searched for them. We finally found them squashed flat – they’d fallen in the road and been run over by a car. We live in a town that redefines the word “tiny” so it was several days before I was able to get an appointment in the bigger town closest to us and it was miserable! While I was fine to function around the house, everything I tried to read was fuzzy. I’m much more careful with my glasses after that experience.

      • Laurie Stone

      • 7 years ago

      Shelley, Funny, the things we take for granted. I still misplace my glasses all the time, but definitely treat them with more care than I did before. I realized I need them more than I want to admit.

  3. Ahhhhhh yes.
    Been there.
    Waved at that 🙂
    Wanted to crawl under the table afterward.

      • Laurie Stone

      • 7 years ago

      Carla, Glad I’m not the only one!

  4. I love my glasses actually…but now they aren’t working..I need cataract surgery in both eyes and have been putting it off…I can’t any longer….if I want to see.

      • Laurie Stone

      • 7 years ago

      Renee, Everyone who has had cataract surgery said the results were awesome, they wish they did it sooner. However, I understand your hesitation. Eye surgery is not a fun prospect.

  5. Hi Laurie! Yes…I think sometimes we forget that we are fortunate to be able to buy and HAVE glasses. It’s so easy to “wish” things were the way they were before rather than appreciate what we do have today. I think your “reminder”was a great thing for you. Thanks for sharing it. ~Kathy

      • Laurie Stone

      • 7 years ago

      Kathy, You’re right about being able to have glasses. For many poor cultures, they are a luxury. I can’t imagine life without eyesight correction. Great point.

  6. I’m fortunate in that I only need glasses for reading. But in the past year, that need has become more constant, hence I’m building up quite a collection of readers, strategically placed here, there and everywhere (desk, bedside, den, purse, glove compartment) to reduce the risk of forgetting where I placed them if I only had a single pair. Something as simple as reading the directions on a bottle of OTC allergy medication, or email on my phone, is now impossible without glasses. It’s hardly the worst problem in the world to have, but it’s sure a reminder that my eyes (along with the rest of me) are getting older. Sigh…

      • Laurie Stone

      • 7 years ago

      Roxanne, On the rare days I wear contacts now, I have readers everywhere (which I need on top of my contacts). I also have regular glasses, readers that are also sunglasses, transition lenses (which must be worn with sunglasses over them in the car). The list goes on. Eyesight becomes complicated as we get older.

  7. I had to start wearing them about two years ago and I couldn’t wear contacts. I hate having to wear them, but I love to see more so they’re on my face 24/7. I often forget to take them off in the shower or go to sleep with them on. You get used to them…dentures now that’s another story.

      • Laurie Stone

      • 7 years ago

      Rena, Laughing over wearing glasses in the shower. You are blasé!

  8. I had to give up my contacts for good about 6 years ago. I could not get them off my eyeballs and then my panic would make the situations worse. I now wear my glasses which are bifocals all the time. The good news is that frames hide a plethora of sins like bags and no eye make. I buy at least one new pair yearly from Zenni Optical because they are very affordable. I can have fashionable glasses like an accessory.

      • Laurie Stone

      • 7 years ago

      Haralee, I like “glasses as fashion accessory.” Sometimes I watch “Soul Sunday” with Oprah Winfrey. I notice she always wears glasses that match her outfit. Interesting strategy. Its nice to have a pair or two that match outfit and mood!

    • Marci Carson

    • 7 years ago

    Hi Laurie,
    I have been wearing contacts since 13. I started wearing glasses in 4 th grade. Never liked them, It really bothered me having something on my face.
    I just turned 60, I still am able to wear my soft lenses. I have a mono vision prescription, one contact is for reading and one is for distance, somehow the brain adapts. This way I do not need reading glasses.
    I have a pair of glasses that I put on at night and put away in the morning. I do have to put my makeup on before I put in my contacts. The mono vision does not work for putting on makeup!
    I have the beginnings of cataracts, I am hoping I can hold off wearing glasses all the time until I have cataract surgery. Most people find they don’t need glasses anymore after the surgery( my Mom didn’t). You will need reading glasses though.
    I am so nearsighted, if I don’t put my glasses on my nightstand in the same place, I can’t find them. That’s when Hubby comes to the rescue.
    So, so far so good on my quest to avoid glasses full time. I enjoy your blog so much. Keep on writing!!!

      • Laurie Stone

      • 7 years ago

      Marci, Thanks for the kind words. Wow, you and I live in parallel universes. I also just turned 60 and started wearing glasses in 4th grade. Sounds like you’re doing a good job, staving off the need for full-time glasses. I’ve also heard after cataract surgery, vision is better. Let’s hope!

  9. I get it! I have developed ocular rosacea (and it feels exactly as you describe your eyes do). Before the docs figured it out, I could not wear my contacts at all. The stinging/burning/sandpaper feel was too much. And while I don’t mind wearing glasses by choice, when it’s foisted upon you by necessity–well, it makes you feel old! Just know you have a compadre out here sporting bright purple frames (hey, if I need to wear them, they may as well be a happy color).

      • Laurie Stone

      • 7 years ago

      Kristine, I love the purple frame idea. In fact, on my to-do list is to buy a more funky, fun pair. Glad I’m not the only one going through this.

  10. I’ve been wondering what I’ll do when I can’t see well enough to put eye-make up on. I’ll either go without I guess, or tell someone to let me know before I go out looking like Bette Davis.

      • Laurie Stone

      • 6 years ago

      Susan, Laughing at the Bette Davis image!

  11. I so understand! I often look all over for them only to realize they re on top of my head!

      • Laurie Stone

      • 6 years ago

      Connie, I’m going to relent and finally get those eyeglass holders for around my neck.

  12. I’ve been fortunate to need only readers, and that only began occurring a few years ago. In the past year or so, however, that need has become almost constant. It’s humbling, frustrating, even maddening sometimes (where in HELL are my glasses??!!). And like someone else mentioned, they’re invariably right on top of my head. I’ve also started strategically placing extra pairs all over the house, just in case…

      • Laurie Stone

      • 6 years ago

      Roxanne, I have one pair of prescription lenses, which is crazy. I’m always misplacing them, which is foolhardy, considering how important they are. You’re lucky to only need readers!

  13. Except for about 7 years in the 80’s, I’ve worn glasses since I was 8. I have extremely dry eyes and was wearing extended wear contacts on a daily basis. Then I started working at in a building which was extremely dry. The door would close behind me and I could feel the moisture being sucked out of my eyes as I walked to my desk. I went back to glasses and have never strayed back I now have a purple pair and a turquoise pair and interchange them whenever I feel like it. I am willing to spend hundreds on my frames in order to get something that I really like after all, I wear them more than any one piece of clothing item in my closet.

      • Laurie Stone

      • 6 years ago

      Jennifer, I want to look into funkier frames. I have the same boring wire ones, which sort of disappear, but I’d like to be more fashionable. I know what you mean about dry air. That’s the worst.

  14. I’ve never liked contact lenses, so I have always been dependent on my eye glasses, especially since I turned 40 ( YEARS ago) and discovered I needed bifocals…the realities of aging can be harsh. So I am always very keen on knowing where my glasses are, but its not full proof. Several times I was in a panic looking for my glasses. When that happens they are usually in one of two places ( in the bathroom, or …on my head)! Like I said…the realities of aging can be harsh! 🙂

      • Laurie Stone

      • 6 years ago

      Darlene, I’m always looking for my glasses, which is crazy, considering I can’t see without them. Glad I’m not the only one!

  15. I love your candid take on the need for glasses, Laurie! In my mid-40s I started wearing readers, but couldn’t bear to wear them while singing in our choir for fear of looking like an old lady peering over my readers while singing. I can wear a monovision contact for that and for when I am teaching (fearing the same). When I discovered sunglass readers I was in heaven until I needed a prescription for transition lenses. Got tired of taking off the sunglass readers to walk into the store and digging out my regular readers to look at labels. My eye doc said my once eagle eyes needed a bump in distance to 20/25 (from 20/16),,,oh the horror! When I got my new lenses I could see further away! I joked with my hubby as we sat in the back of church that I could now see our pastor’s eyes 🙂 Now I don’t have to wear eye-makeup to run to the store–just throw on my glasses and done! Thanks for writing such a great post on this.

      • Laurie Stone

      • 6 years ago

      Terri, Thanks for the kind words. Yes, we sound like we live in parallel universes. I also have multiple glasses for different functions — readers, reader sunglasses, regular glasses, transition lenses. The list goes on and on…

  16. Oh my gosh, Laurie! Too funny, yet I feel your pain! I’ve been battling with my contacts for over a year now. Not because they don’t feel good, it’s just, I can’t read my cellphone with them in! I’ve been trying out these multi-focal contacts which are cool, but I just can’t see as far now. I can’t win! The only time I’m comfy is when I wear my glasses, and like you, I take them off as soon as I can. My eyes are getting older and I’m really not digging the alternatives. 🙂

    B

      • Laurie Stone

      • 6 years ago

      Bren, Its hard when our eyes start aging. I actually read best with nothing in my eyes, even though I’m blind as a bat with distance. Go figure. Sounds like we have similar problems.

  17. Laurie, I can so relate. I wear contacts. At night, I take them out and watch TV with my glasses, that rarely leave my bedside. I don’t wear them during the day, when I go out…nowhere else but in bed. One of these days, I’ll likely need to switch to glasses full time. Until that day comes, I’ll continue to stick tiny, thin pieces of plastic in my eyes.

      • Laurie Stone

      • 6 years ago

      Oh Valerie, I miss those tiny pieces of plastic. I still hate wearing glasses, but the alternative is not seeing anything! Enjoy your ability to wear contacts while you can.

  18. Hi Laurie! I’ve been wearing glasses for distance for years. I never considered them a symptom of getting older, just a tool to help me see better. And I started wearing hearing aids 3 years ago and it was one of the best things I did for myself because suddenly I could talk on the phone and actually hear most of what people were saying. I think as the years go by we have the choice of thinking that getting older is “hard” or we have the choice of thinking getting older requires change. Things change. Actually everything is changing all the time. We error or suffer when we try to make things stay the same. I’m all for going with the flow and finding the silver lining instead! ~Kathy

      • Laurie Stone

      • 6 years ago

      Wonderful attitude, Kathy. You’re right about aging. We have to adapt as our bodies change with time. Acceptance is key.

  19. Grade four. That’s when I first got my glasses. Cat eye. It was the rage. I’ve worn them ever since (glasses, not necessarily cat-eye shaped), with a short stint of contacts-wearing in College. I’ve just always worn them. Hadn’t considered how they look. I guess I always was more concerned with being able to look! 🙂

      • Laurie Stone

      • 6 years ago

      Diane, I also was diagnosed as near-sighted in 4th grade! I still remember my first glasses — light blue and also cat-eyed! We both must have made quite the fashion statement! And yes, good attitude. Seeing is most important.

  20. I’ve been wearing contacts for the past 9 years now, and I thought I would never get back to wearing glasses ever again. But the problem is, I heard that wearing contacts daily can weaken your vision, so I’m trying to wear glasses more to prevent that from happening.

    We should always try to adapt and not get stubborn when we just can’t keep doing what we want to do.

      • Laurie Stone

      • 6 years ago

      Omar, Yes, its taken a while to adapt to glasses, but there’s no choice. I agree with your decision to not wear contacts all the time. Its good to give eyes oxygen and let them see without them.

    • Sandra

    • 5 years ago

    I have worn glasses since the 4th grade. I started with contacts in high school, but over the past five years have gone back to my glasses. Contacts are a pain in the butt!

      • Laurie Stone

      • 5 years ago

      Sandra, Sounds like we live in parallel universes! That was also my optical timeline. Yes, contacts are a pain, literally. Wish I could wear them, but can’t.

  21. You’ve just written my story… all of it… classmates thinking I might be standoffish, no longer being able to wear contacts. While I’ll never be crazy about wearing glasses, I take really good care of them, because I’d literally be lost without them.

      • Laurie Stone

      • 5 years ago

      Brenda, I’ve become very careful with my glasses. I finally realized how precious they are. Sounds like you’ve gone through the same journey.

  22. Still choosing sight over vanity! Even with my glasses, I’ve waved to the wrong person! Eeep. Will you still be my friend?

      • Laurie Stone

      • 4 years ago

      Diane, Of course, because I’ve probably done the same thing! My compromise is I wear my glasses, but take them off as soon as I can… hence the “mis-waving.”

  23. I wear contacts most of the time. They are bifocal now. However in the past few weeks I have had to use cheaters which means it’s time for another appointment with my eye doc which is this Friday. I hate wearing my glasses not out of vanity but because I just don’t see as well with them as I do contacts.

      • Laurie Stone

      • 4 years ago

      Lauren, I’ve gotten used to life without contacts, although I miss them from a vanity standpoint. My compromise is I take my glasses off as soon as I can. Good luck at the eye doctor’s!

  24. I wear glasses. I’d love to have contact lenses but since I have bifocals I don’t think it is possible. I’m so used to wearing mine I often get into the shower forgetting that I’m still wearing them.

      • Laurie Stone

      • 4 years ago

      Rena, I think they make bifocal contacts, believe it or not. When I wore contacts all the time, I’d wear them everywhere, including the shower!

  25. So I couldn’t help focussing (ha) on why your contacts feel so bad all of a sudden. I am a 60+ year wearer of various contacts while all myf riends had vision correcting surgery so I need mine! How did it happen?

      • Laurie Stone

      • 3 years ago

      Carol, I had corneal issues. It wasn’t one day I could wear contacts and the next day I couldn’t. It was gradual. But believe it or not, have grown used to glasses.

  26. I can so relate. I’ve worn contacts since I was 14 and went through all the iterations. I can’t see well at all with my glasses which, for many years, were the wrong prescription. I’m having cataract surgery on both eyes next week and look forward to having my eyes fixed so I never have to wear contacts again. At least, I hope it works out that way.

      • Laurie Stone

      • 3 years ago

      Rebecca, Wishing you all the best with your wonderful, new eyes!

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