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Yup. We’re “those” people in the neighborhood, the ones who can’t keep their dog in their yard. Why does every canine we own need to escape — if only for an hour — every chance they get? We feed them, house them, walk them, and love them. They love us back, but damn. Is it us?

This problem began with Ren (yes, he looked like the star of the 90’s cartoon, “Ren & Stimpy.”). Ren’s favorite hobby was running away and yapping at people in their own yards. Picture having your nightly cocktail interrupted by a toothy, bat-eyed Chihuahua barking like you just pulled his tail.

Some neighbors had more of a sense of humor than others. And I honestly don’t blame those who didn’t. In fact, I’m surprised Ren survived to the ripe old age of 14.

Our next dog Simon had love on his mind when he hit the highway. His crush was named (aptly or not)… Prudence. She was a cute little Lhasa Apso with white fur and lived one street over. Simon adored Prudence, but she was just one stop on the cookie route.

With Simon, we’d get calls from people miles away. And always was the same embarrassing question…“Are you the owners of this dog?” We knew what was implied. Are you the idiots who can’t keep your animal on your property?

My husband Randy bought customized collars with Simon’s name, address, and telephone number. We would’ve added blood type and zodiac sign if needed.

People often asked how Simon escaped. The answer many times was… we didn’t know.

Aside from the occasional door left open, there were afternoons I’d get a call saying Simon was in a neighbor’s yard. I’d look around, having no idea he was out of the house. There was no sign of exit. Harry Houdini would’ve scratched his head in confusion.

Years passed. We now have cute, little lap dog Libby. I breathed a sigh of relief when we adopted her. Females don’t roam, I was always told. Hallelujah. Then I lived with Libby a few weeks. Females don’t roam?

Libby can’t be trusted near any open door. We had to set up this elaborate exit drill whenever we leave the house. Someone must hold Libby while everyone makes a hasty retreat. The last one must maneuver out the door while thrusting Libby as far away from the exit as possible. Trust me, it’s easier said than done.

The bad news is Libby roams. The good news is we know where she goes. Libby has found true love next door with handsome canine swain Roscoe. (And yes, thank God, she’s fixed).

I learned about Roscoe last time Libby ran. I was starting to panic when a young woman appeared on our driveway, holding Libby while pushing a baby carriage. She was the nanny next door.

“Are you her owner?” she asked. I cringed, feeling the usual shame. We were now three for three in the escaping dog department. She told me about Roscoe and handed back Libby. Like many dog finders over the years, I was struck by her kindness and patience.

And so it goes. Our house now has borders, guards and observation towers that would shock Gitmo. We know where Libby is at any given moment. Hannibal Lecter had less monitoring.

Not to mention, it’s scary when she’s gone. Could she have run out on the road? Is she the midday snack of some coyote?

There’s nothing worse than when she’s missing, but there’s nothing better than the sight of her returning – either in my husband’s car or the arms of one of my sons or the nanny next door. I want to scold and hug her at the same time.

And yes, it’s getting harder to deny all these AWOL canines aren’t somehow about us. But where did we go wrong? Why don’t we ever have dogs that stay put? Our neighborhood’s awash in pooches and I never see any — except ours — trotting along the road untethered.

Someday we’ll crack this code. If we don’t, the same solution will present itself that always has. Libby will simply outgrow her love of the open highway. Like Simon and Ren, she’ll grow old.

In the meantime, all we can do is keep her away from open doors, buy lots of collars, and accept the fact we’ll always be “those” people.

Sigh.

 

Do you have an errant dog that likes to escape? Comments (and suggestions) are always welcome. Thanks for reading and if you like, please share. Thank you!

Comments(22)

  1. Oh this would make me crazy! We have cats and stupidly used to allow them outdoors. After one fight they are indoor cats. Dogs are different because you have to let them outside. What an ordeal you’ve been through!

      • Laurie Stone

      • 8 years ago

      Cathy, It does make us crazy but we’ve learned to cope after all these years. We also have an old cat who hasn’t been outside since 2007 so that problem’s solved. Thanks for reading!

  2. I wonder why your dogs have a history of roaming. It’s like the Shawshank Redemption, but with a couple of sequels. 🙂

      • Laurie Stone

      • 8 years ago

      Laughing!! Maybe it’s the Paw-Shank Redemption. Sorry, Bun, couldn’t resist.

    • Ginger lundeen

    • 8 years ago

    We’ve had the invisible fence installed …it’s great !! The dog roams our yard and doesn’t leave …it was worth every penny we spent !

      • Laurie Stone

      • 8 years ago

      Ginger, We’ve thought about that and may make the plunge someday. Good suggestion and other people I know swear by them. Thanks for reading!

  3. I love stories about dogs! We had runners, too, but with our current dog sweetheart, we all went through rigorous training and she is perfect now, much better behaved than any of the humans in or family. Except…she started visiting 1 neighbor. So I talked to my neighbor-friend, because I didn’t want to be “one of those” and she said, “no, it’s no problem, when we saw Oakley outside in your yard, we call her over and pet her and give her a treat.” Ok! You’re stuck with her I guess. Thanks for a great post. And applause for “pawshank”

      • Laurie Stone

      • 7 years ago

      Jena, Sounds like you also have understanding neighbors. So glad Oakley is mostly behaving herself!

  4. Laurie, you need to adopt dummer dogs. It’s obvious the canine members of your household are super smart and need input. 🙂 I don’t know . . . Maybe their own reality TV show?

      • Laurie Stone

      • 7 years ago

      Diane, They’re obviously smarter than all of us! You’re right, before adopting next time there should be some sort of IQ test. The dumber the better.

  5. Yes. We were THOSE PEOPLE for years and years. This was when we had kids growing up at home with lots of activity and coming-and-going at our house. We even had a dog who got out and killed a neighbor’s cat (that was pretty awful). Now — we are two aging, retired adults who are at home pretty much all the time and who dote on a 13-year-old Shih Tzu who happens to have gone blind in the past year. She is our sweet baby, and we cater to her every whim — so, no, she does not get out and roam. I kind of miss the old days with the kids and their friends banging in and out of the house — letting the dogs out to tarnish our reputation and wreak havoc in the neighborhood.

      • Laurie Stone

      • 7 years ago

      Carol, Thank God we’re not the only ones. So sorry about your dog and the neighbor’s cat. That would be difficult. Yes, since we only have one son living at home, I feel our AWOL problems have gone down a little. But you’re right. It was nice to have those busy, bustling days of long ago.

  6. We have a little black Lab mix that behaves for months, and then all of a sudden turns into an escapee. She has dug under the fence in so many places the whole perimeter has buried blocks to prevent her fleeing. She is almost 9 now, has been spayed since she was a puppy, so that isn’t the problem. No digging since last summer and now she’s practically levitating to get out. I don’t have an answer. I wish I did!

      • Laurie Stone

      • 7 years ago

      Lisa, Sounds like the same deal as us. I laugh when I hear females don’t roam. They’re worse than the males! Good luck with your little black Lab. Maybe as she gets older, the urge will diminish.

  7. We lived on 2 acres of bushland for 20 yrs and our little jack russell cross found EVERY dip or crevice on the fence line. We chicken wired it so he couldn’t fit thru the gaps – then he’d go under. We ended up putting a stick thru his collar for a while to make him wider and stop him wriggling through. It drove us nuts but he was so proud of his ability to escape.

      • Laurie Stone

      • 7 years ago

      Leanne, Terriers are the worst. They’re bred as hunting dogs to go over, under and through. That’s so funny about putting a stick through his collar! Hey, whatever works.

  8. This post made me laugh! Our dogs were runners until we walked them regularly. But I happen to know you DO walk your dogs regularly, so I’m stumped. Maybe more play dates?
    Dogs. Who can figure them out…
    I know if it was me, I’d stick around your house. Good company there! 😉

      • Laurie Stone

      • 3 years ago

      Thanks, Diane! Yes, even with dogs regularly walked, they liked to go AWOL sometimes. Nothing like the open road, I guess.

  9. This would totally freak me out if it happened to our tiny ones!

      • Laurie Stone

      • 3 years ago

      It has freaked me out with Libby. We watch her carefully.

  10. Karma, my friend. Karma! 😉 I love this post so much!

      • Laurie Stone

      • 3 years ago

      Carol, Thank you so much!

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